“Awake”

I’d been there
a million
times before.

So familiar,
more nonfiction
than lore.

I stood
there
all alone.

Until a gentle touch
warmed my waist
to the bone.

A whisper
to my ear
of words with no recall.

You moved away
but always back
if I were to fall.

I’d been here
a million times
before.

But everything wasn’t
real to me
anymore.

Locked eyes
meeting
across the room.

Caused a
rush of thoughts
to bloom.

The only real
ones there
were us.

We were still
in all
the fuss.

You
were so
real.

Only
you were my dreams
to steal.

Photo by gbarkz on Unsplash

©2021 Jai Lynn

This post “Awake” appeared first on Jai Lynn.

Twitter | Instagram|Pinterest

“The Glue”

Thirteen years
went by in 1…..
2….
3.

An airport
on a dark
lonely night.

A plane
arriving late,
finally in sight.

A broken family,
tattered
but true.

You
and Jewel
the lasting glue.

The sidewalk
will never
be the same.

No one to make sure
the strangers
stay tame.

The top of the stairs
will always be for
the both of you.

I sit there now,
alone
imagining you two.

Death
is not
the end.

One day,
we will all be
reunited again.

(My dog Ike recently passed away. He is the one on the left. Jewel, his sister, passed in 2015. Though I can’t see them, I feel the both of them are still around. This poem is dedicated to them.)

©2021 Jai Lynn

This post “The Glue” appeared first on Jai Lynn.

Twitter | Instagram|Pinterest

“Addict”

I know
it’s bad for me.

Recommended one dose
and I’ll take three.

Better choices
but the Devil is what I see.

Drinking the poison
like it’s tea.

Desperation for something
making me fall to the knee.

You say I have a choice
but shackles aren’t free.

I know
it’s bad for me.

But the bad choice
is all I’ll ever be.

Photo by GRAS GRÜN on Unsplash

©2021 Jai Lynn

This post “Addict” appeared first on Jai Lynn.

Twitter | Instagram|Pinterest

Snapshot 5/31/21 // “Me in May”

Currently listening:Soul Mate” – flora cash
Currently watching: Steven Universe
Currently playing: The World Ends With You: Final Remix
Currently reading: The Dream Thieves by Maggie Stiefvater

May was an interesting month. It was the best of months, it was the worst of months. It was the month where I made a lot of stark changes. For one thing I got my yearly haircut, yes you read that right yearly. So the length is now at my shoulders and ready for the heat. BRING IT ON SUMMER. I also got a blond streak in my hair which I love and is something totally new. Yes, yes, yes, yes and oh one other thing. Did I mention I got a tattoo?

I wanted a tattoo since forever and was supposed to get one last year. So this month I decided to just DO IT. So I did. I know some of you know what this is haha, and all I can say is I’m in love!

May Goals:

  1. Focus on me. Yes, I think I did this.
  2. Watch my sugar intake. No, I think I did not do this.
  3. Watch my caloric intake. 😦
  4. Get at least 10,000 steps everyday. 🙂
  5. Do yoga every damn day. 🙂
  6. Work on The Lowell Saga. 🙂
  7. Watch your spending. :/ I may have indulged a little, but not a lot. It was on books, okay?
  8. GET THAT TATTOO. DONE!!!!
I did half so…

June (the month where summer is here and I am ALIVE) Goals:

  1. Focus on the present. It’s summer and I want to have fun. Enough said.
  2. Watch my sugar intake. Take 3.
  3. Work on The Lowell Saga. Keeping the dream ALIVE.

What I Read:

  • The Tea Dragon Society by Katie O’Neill. This book went above and beyond my expectations. I knew it would be good, I knew it would be adorable but then I read it and it was just SO good and SO adorable that I can’t wait to get my hands on the next in the series. The graphics are wonderful and warm and just give you this good feeling inside as you read. I felt calm every time I picked it up and can’t say how much if you need a book to get you relaxed JUST READ THIS. Diversity, wholesomeness, dragons, and tea honestly what more do I need to say?
  • The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater. This book. This book. This book. I’ve read it over and over and no matter how many times it always feels like the first time. I fall in love over and over and over again. This book is complex, simple, reality, dreams, and magic all tied into one. And it all feels so real. I love it so much. I read this book years ago at the right time in my life and it has stayed with me since and will stay with me forever more. The Raven Cycle will always be in the top of the top of my favorite books and it is a series I believe that played a hand in who I am today and who I will probably become tomorrow. And I know a lot of you feel the same way if you’ve read it.
  • Fruits Basket v.11 by Natsuki Takaya
  • Kuroko’s Basketball Omnibus #3 (v.5+6) by Tadatoshi Fujimaki
  • The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. Five stars all across. A beautiful perspective on living, dying and all the paths we don’t take. Definitely deserves a read, and that’s all I can say.

What I’ll Be Writing:

  • Poetry- posted every Wednesday
  • Writing Is Hard | WIP Writing Update- posted in the middle of the month
  • Snapshot! Monthly Recap- posted the last day of every month
  • Announcements- posted as needed

If you want more information about any of the above, you can check out the About page on my site or just click here.

Marvelous Posts I Read in May:

My Round Up of May Posts:

Summer. Summer! SUMMER!!! It is my favorite season and I can’t wait to go back to the ocean and eat ice cream and since we are all vaccinated now visit my family and hang with my friends and THRIVE ❤

Finally.

What are your plans for summer?

Till next time,

Twitter | Instagram|Pinterest

Writing is Hard | WIP Update | May 2021 | It’s Part of the Journey

Previous post: Writing is Hard | WIP Update | April 2021 | Vienna

Doesn’t May make you sad sometimes? I don’t know… this could just be me rambling but May means summer is almost here, but not yet. And that’s the thing. Summer isn’t here yet so I’m sad. But also, the year moved by so fast and that means that summer (once it comes) will end again too. I don’t know about you but I love summer and I’ve been waiting for what feels like forever for it to come back.

What my beautiful metaphor of an opening paragraph is alluding to is that with writing too I’ve been sad this month, and I’m a little worried about like… everything. My emotions have been up and down, riding all the waves of May. Self doubt is a killer. Everyone has those moments of what am I doing with my life? I had a few this month, and I’ve come to the realization that at the end of it, even if I don’t “make it” or whatever at least I tried my best. At least I listened to my heart. I’ve been writing when I can and planning when I can’t. But I keep going and that’s the point.

Probably because I’m stubborn as shit. And I feel this weird incessant calling to have to write. So. There we go.

In high school, I loved to write for fun. I would scribble poems in the margins of my notebook and I would write fanfiction on the back of handouts. I think in the back of my mind I was subconsciously aware that one day I would end up as a writer, but freshman/sophmore year of high school it was just a very distant dream. I would even go as far to say that the me at that time would say she didn’t want to be a writer. Maybe even at all. You see at that time in my life I wanted to do something with my life. Like, be a firefighter and rescue innocents from burning buildings or be a physical therapist and help injured athletes rehabilitate. I (wrongly) didn’t view writing and becoming a published author as doing something with my life at that time which is so vastly different to who I am now.

So I resisted.

Part of the reason I believe I felt this way was because I thought that if writing became my profession than that would suck all the fun out of my favorite thing. Writing when I was young was escapism, it kept me calm, it made the world seem like a beautiful dream of possibility. But the reality of my life was school, and if I haven’t already said it enough before I loathed school. LOATHED. Literally.

School was my job and my job wasn’t fun. I never wanted that to happen with writing. That was part of the reason and the other was my idealistic sense of purpose that I wanted to be a hero. I mean who doesn’t, at least at some point in their life?

But honestly, maybe I was just afraid.

If I am being honest, I still am.

The Lowell Saga (TLS), as you all know, is the working name for my current WIP. The more I work on it the more I see all its faults. 😦 But I also see all its potential. 😀 If I can figure it out, then I know I can make this a great story that will hopefully one day be published. Gosh that’s my dream guys. I’m trying here.

This month I got more writing in. Not a lot, but something so I can keep moving in the right direction. May was all ups and downs for me but June will be much more steady. Calm shores and not rocky waves. No one can predict the future but this is what I am trying to manifest lol.

This month I think I’ll talk a little bit about one of the main premises of TLS which is what essentially the entire plot revolves around. The treasure hunt. Their is no one great category to put my weird WIP in but if I had to I’d sayTLS is some weird mix of fantasy, magical realism, young adult/coming of age/new adult, adventure, mystery, noir, anime inspired beast of a story vibes. (That is such a weird combination, Jai, like WTF?) Yes I know that is what you are all probably thinking haha, BUT by the time I actually finish with the story though who knows what it will be? The beauty of drafting is that things can change at any time.

But not the treasure hunt aspect. No that is a main part of the story and always has been. There are seven lost artifacts that my main characters, essentially the main trio, will be revolving around for the entirety of the books. And I can tell you they encounter at least three of them in the first book. 😉

How are your stories going? I would love to hear so we can vibe together!

Till next time,

Twitter | Instagram|Pinterest

word count: 75,752

“Day Dreaming”

Golden light
on bare skin.

Mint chocolate chip
painted across nails.

Laughter and yells
in the bright sea salt air.

The ocean
awaiting the incumbent return.

How can I
put it to words
when it means
so much more?

Every other season
is a dream.
For it is
only
in the summer
I am awake.

And the irony is…
summer
is the only season
where life actually
is
a beautiful dream.

Photo by Scott Trento on Unsplash

©2021 Jai Lynn

This post “Day Dreaming” appeared first on Jai Lynn.

Twitter | Instagram|Pinterest

“High Functioning”

She wears the suit
with the heels so high.

She moves with purpose
even as she says goodbye.

She can laugh
with the best,
and sympathize
with the worst.

She listens to your troubles
and she bottles the rest.

She’ll get a perfect score
on that invisible test.

She smiles like she knows
though
it’s just a habit
she can’t break.

Even alive people
can be dead,
just better at the fake.

©2021 Jai Lynn

This post “High Functioning” appeared first on Jai Lynn.

Twitter | Instagram|Pinterest

Snapshot 4/30/21 // “Excelsior!”

Currently listening:All Too Well” – Taylor Swift
Currently watching: Shadow and Bone
Currently playing: The World Ends With You: Final Remix
Currently reading: The Raven Boys by Maggie Stiefvater

Um, hi. So I don’t know what April was if I am going to be honest with y’all. I mean, like, I didn’t get sick! So that’s breaking a previous two year strong curse where I always got sick in April. In fact it was quite the opposite. I got vaccinated!! So that makes me happy, and makes life at least feel somewhat better. Work has been hectic but, not bad? Just different and even though at times I get a little sad I know that where I am now is for the best. In fact since my promotion I’ve really been finding my writing groove. So another positive.

I got to see my friends who I hadn’t seen since last autumn. That was magical, and we had a magical time. Also my family which I never got to see for Christmas came over for a spring party!! So that was amazing because it was Christmas for me in April. I missed my family and friends so so so SO much times infinity. Another win for the month.

April was good actually. Just there was so much going on at work at times that I tended to get stressed out. Some of my healthy habits went wayside let us say and there was some cake eaten. In fact, a lot of cake eaten. A lot of delicious cake. So again, maybe not all that bad? Maybe I’m just really tired. But a good tired, the kind of tired you get after putting in a hard day’s work. But also happy? Because I got a lot done and got to see a lot of people I dearly love and missed.

Also, ya know, summer…. I FEEL YOU COMING.

April Goals:

  1. Watch my sugar intake! FAILURE. DID I MENTION THE CAKE?
  2. Work on The Lowell Saga! Check. Go me.

May (the month where I become a hermit and focus on myself) Goals:

  1. Focus on me. I need to stop worrying about everyone else and just listen to my needs. I am an enneagram type 2 and this is the realest lesson I need to learn. That way I can stop reaching for the cake.
  2. Watch my sugar intake. Take 2.
  3. Watch my caloric intake. Girl, girl, no more binging. We got rid of this habit, don’t go back to it.
  4. Get at least 10,000 steps everyday. You lost your workout routine after COVID hit. Time to get it back.
  5. Do yoga every damn day. You get stressed, so get unstressed. (Cue me, realizing I’m talking to myself through this whole list lol. At this point I am just going to continue on. Excelsior!).
  6. Work on The Lowell Saga. Keep going. You are getting there step by step.
  7. Watch your spending. Girl. Save your damn money, you do not need more books when there are PLENTY waiting on your shelf .
  8. GET THAT TATTOO. You have wanted it forever so just. do. it.

What I Read:

  • Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins.
  • Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman. Good read. Had me laughing out loud at times which is a win because it is hard to make me laugh when I’m reading a book. I would not call it a life changing read but it did open my eyes to some aspects of my own life that I know I need to improve upon. I also thought the ending was satisfying but I could see where some others might not find it completely so. But I think it ended well, and I’m glad I read it.
  • Where the Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak. Read this two more times this month.

What I’ll Be Writing:

  • Poetry- posted every Wednesday
  • Writing Is Hard | WIP Writing Update- posted in the middle of the month
  • Snapshot! Monthly Recap- posted the last day of every month
  • Announcements- posted as needed

If you want more information about any of the above, you can check out the About page on my site or just click here.

Amazing Posts I Read in April:

My Round Up of April Posts:

I randomly started rereading The Raven Boys this past Saturday (St. Mark’s Eve, lol) and it has been the greatest form of self care I could ever imagine. Rediscovering one of your favorite books all over again is like falling in love. To me at least. I didn’t plan on reading it, I did it spontaneously at like 10 o’clock at night after I saw Maggie’s insta post about St. Mark’s Eve and since then I have not been able to put the book down. Like, Gansey… I am falling in love with him all over again. *SPOILER* Even as I watch Blue trying to fight it, I’m just like girl. Girl. GIRL. ThErE iS NO pOInT.

Come on guys be real with me…. tell me which favorite character of yours is it that you can’t help but fall in love with read through after read through no matter how many times you’ve read their story?

Till next time,

Twitter | Instagram|Pinterest