“Within and Without”

Everyone
is looking at me.

I almost wonder
what they see.

A servant girl
who would contort and bow.

And the someone different
who stands before them now.

Straight line bent into a corner
sharp and tight.

A golden ray
transformed into the night.

How much
do they know?

Will they miss me
when I go?

I can’t help
but smile.

Sweetness hiding
something vile.

Now I can match
each and every stare.

Because finally
I don’t care.

Photo by Lesly Juarez on Unsplash

©2021 Jai Lynn

This post “Within and Without” appeared first on Jai Lynn.

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“Running”

It’s just
you
and me.

Concrete slapping,
and my heels
hard tapping.

Sun blazing,
and the heat
unwavering.

Chest heaving,
and the thoughts
all leaving.

When I run,
I don’t do it
for fun.

Emotions messy,
and my nerves
testy.

Mother Nature,
the only opponent
to match my wager.

It’s just
her
against me.

And for now
the winner,
yet to be.

Photo by Jeremy Lapak on Unsplash

©2021 Jai Lynn

This post “Running” appeared first on Jai Lynn.

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Snapshot 7/31/21 // “The Widow in Black”

Currently listening:Aerith’s Theme” – Nobuo Uematsu
Currently watching: Pokemon S1 // every Marvel movie in chronological order
Currently playing: Final Fantasy VII: Remake
Currently reading: Love and Olives by Jenna Evans Welch

I took a much needed break in July. Some of you might have noticed that I didn’t post my writing update this month. That was intentional since I didn’t write anything. Lol. After finishing the first draft of book 1 of The Lowell Saga in June I needed a mental break before I head back in to revising it. August is going to be interesting. A lot of work I know but something I am welcoming and looking forward to!

I also saw Black Widow this month and can I just say I love, love, loved it. Especially Yelena and her vest, omg. Black Widow is my favorite avenger and I am glad she finally got her own standalone movie. I loved it so much it put me in the mood to watch every Marvel movie every made again in chronological order. Yes, ambitious I know but I’m enjoying it so far. I just finished Iron Man and am going to start Iron Man 2 soon. In other news I was feeling nostalgic and a bit down as well so I started rewatching the original Pokemon anime from the 90’s. It’s doing wonders for relaxing me since it was practically all I watched as a kid.

July was a break I needed. I slept a lot, read a bit, and hung outside just taking in the sun. I might even need to do more of that in August since I have a vitamin D deficiency lol. It’s fiiiiiine. I’ll figure it out, like I always do. I also have a B-12 deficiency which could explain why I’ve been feeling so tired these past few months. But I’m taking vitamins now so all and all I should be on an upswing!

July Goals:

  1. Watch my sugar intake. Check. I gained some weight in July so that push finally got me back to making healthier choices so my sugar intake is definitely less.
  2. Work on The Lowell Saga. In a round about way by resting this month I did complete this goal because now I can head into August with fresh eyes for my manuscript and do an even better revising job because I stepped away from it. It can be like reading a new story now!

August (the month where I might have been born) Goals:

  1. Continue to watch my sugar intake. I did great in July and I am hoping to carry it through to August so it becomes a habit.
  2. Jog. I started jogging in July and want to carry this goal over into the next month while the weather is still so perfectly summer.
  3. Work on The Lowell Saga. This has been here every month and will be continue to be here until this is a published book, lol. My determination is strong.

What I Read:

  • The Dream Thieves by Maggie Stiefvater. I read this book all through June and ended up finishing it on July 1st. Right before the 4th. This book is probably one of, if not the top, book in all of the Raven Cycle to me. I love the whole series though as a whole of course, but there is just something about this one. The concept, the stealing, Ronan, Kavinsky, Gansey and Blue on the phone like…. (*INSERT MAJOR ROMANTIC SIGH HERE*). I’ve been rereading the Raven Cycle impulsively and it’s what prompted me to get my ley line tattoo back in May. I grew up with this series and because of that it made me who I am today as a person and as a writer. Maggie’s prose is beautiful and gives you just enough to surprise you and not spoil anything. I hope to be near her level someday with my own writing.
  • Between You, Me, and the Honeybees by Amelia Diane Coombs. This was such a sweet, cute read and exactly the contemporary summer romance vibe I needed for my month of rest. Not to mention the main character suffers from anxiety so that was extra relatable to read about and the main love interest was a soft artist boy so that was also very enjoyable to read about. If you need something light with a happy ending I highly recommend.

What I’ll Be Writing:

  • Poetry- posted every Wednesday
  • Writing Is Hard | WIP Writing Update- posted in the middle of the month
  • Snapshot! Monthly Recap- posted the last day of every month
  • Announcements- posted as needed

If you want more information about any of the above, you can check out the About page on my site or just click here.

Marvelous Posts I Read in July:

My Round Up of July Posts:

August is my favorite month. For obvious reasons. It’s my birthday month! And it’s summer! And I just love everything about that. How are you guys spending your summers? Got any interesting plans? I’m laying low but still enjoying listening to those cicadas sing outside my window and watching the ocean waves roll in.

Till next time,

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“Still”

There is a robin
at the window.

The minutes
are slow.
Too many
places to go.

There is rain
on the ledge.

Soft, gentle
drops tap.
Causing energy
to sap.

There is a girl
sitting down.

Legs held down
like lead.
Tummy aching
and unfed.

Exhaustion
is watching her.

Living
is hard.
Visible candor
without a guard.

She doesn’t
move.

©2021 Jai Lynn

This post “Still” appeared first on Jai Lynn.

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Snapshot 6/30/21 // “(insert big smile here)”

Currently listening: “Driver’s License” – Olivia Rodrigo
Currently watching: Gravity Falls
Currently playing: The World Ends With You: Final Remix
Currently reading: The Dream Thieves by Maggie Stiefvater

June went by really fast. Really fast. But I think that’s because I actually had a lot of fun this month. I saw my friends A LOT, I hung out with my family A LOT, and I ate A LOT of good food. Not to mention, like, it’s SUMMER. The greatest thing to ever exist.

June Goals:

  1. Focus on the present. CHECK.
  2. Watch my sugar intake. FAILURE. Turns out I like sugar, and s’mores, and donuts and blueberry muffins. Like damn.
  3. Work on The Lowell Saga. CHECK, CHECK, CHECK.

July (the month where I just exist in bliss) Goals:

  1. Watch my sugar intake. Take 4?
  2. Work on The Lowell Saga. I FINISHED MY FIRST DRAFT OF BOOK 1. Now, to edit!

What I Read:

  • Words in Deep Blue by Cath Crowley. This book helped me immensely this month. I read it in one gulp. Faster probably than I’ve read any other book this year. I bought it awhile ago and had always been meaning to read it. The timing just never seemed right. After I lost my dog on June 1st, I knew now was the time. This book hit every beat. Every. Beat. It was the perfect remedy to how I had been feeling. The way grief was handled throughout the book, the subtle love story, the books, the ocean… it was what I needed. Five stars. Shout out to Marie @ Drizzle and Hurricane Books for sharing her love of Words in Deep Blue on her blog. I wouldn’t have found it without you!
  • This Time Will Be Different by Misa Sugiura. I enjoyed reading this one! Anything involving a flower shop immediately calls to me. At times I did find CJ the main character a bit difficult to like but she grows throughout and the book, and comes into herself in the end. The lessons learned, and the histories explored through the text also gave me great perspective. The story focuses on moving forward from the past and previous mistakes of our ancestors to building a better and more equal future and taking accountability. We all have the power to do that, inside of us, and that inspires a lot of hope.

What I’ll Be Writing:

  • Poetry- posted every Wednesday
  • Writing Is Hard | WIP Writing Update- posted in the middle of the month
  • Snapshot! Monthly Recap- posted the last day of every month
  • Announcements- posted as needed

If you want more information about any of the above, you can check out the About page on my site or just click here.

Marvelous Posts I Read in May:

My Round Up of May Posts:

It’s been a slow reading month but it’s all good. I FINISHED MY FIRST DRAFT, AND IT’S SUMMER, AND LIFE IS FUN AGAIN!!!

Till next time,

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Writing is Hard | WIP Update | June 2021 | It Is Done.

Previous post: Writing is Hard | WIP Update | May 2021 | It’s Part of the Journey

Okay, um… so! I am just going to cut straight to the chase. I have some news.

I FINISHED MY FIRST DRAFT. I DID IT GUYS. I ACTUALLY DID IT. I REACHED MY GOAL. THE FIRST DRAFT OF (BOOK 1) OF THE LOWELL SAGA IS FINISHEDDDDDD!!!!!!! (But more on this later!)

It feels so weird to me to have actually finished a draft, because in my whole entire life I have never written a whole book before. I always stopped or had gotten bored with the story way before I reached the end. If my high school self could see me now!

As I mentioned in my last writing update, when I was in high school I didn’t want to be a writer. I loved writing and because I loved it so much I never thought it could actually be my job. School was my job back then and I hated school. Wrongly, I believed, that work had to be difficult and something that you really didn’t want to do. (How naive and misguided!) Thankfully, the universe had other plans.

One of the first signs that put me on the path of being a writer came in my sophomore year during English class. We were studying poetry and our teacher assigned us, simply, to just write a poem. I remember I didn’t think much of it. In fact I was in the mode that I just wanted to get it done so in the class following (Driver’s Ed) I finished the assignment. Just like that, between studying the driving manual and scribbling in my notebook, I wrote my poem.

A week later after we had handed them in and our teacher had graded them, she said something that I still think about today. It was a small thing. But isn’t it those small things that make us wonder what if ? My high school English teacher was notoriously hard to please. She was a difficult grader and held us, her Honors English class, to a high standard. What she said was small, and maybe not that significant, but it meant something to me, and apparently still does because here I am writing about it. I don’t remember the exact phrasing but she said something like this, “Some of you should consider having your work published in our newspaper.”

When my poem was finally handed back to me there in bright red pen was just simply the word “Wow!”

And that’s when it hit me she might have been talking about me.

At that point I hadn’t really considered publishing my work before. I was too shy and too nervous. I didn’t want anyone to see my work. I was afraid. I dismissed the idea of having my poem published immediately after the thought had been born. The me back then in no way would do something like that.

The me who exists right now though is completely different. I still wonder what would have happened if I had submitted my poem to the paper. But then I know it’s an impossible thought. Everything happens for a reason and that moment in time served as a marker to set me on the right path. It was a crucial stepping stone, one that seems so small but actually since I’m writing about it now, means a lot.

Especially now. Especially with this particular writing update post.

(And that poem, believe it or not, was eventually published. Just a few years after the fact 😉 Here’s the link if you want to check it out!)

Honestly, I am still in awe. I finished a draft. I finished a draft. I finished a draft!!! Is it perfect? No way in hot hell. But it is done. It is done. IT IS DONE.

I still have a lot of revision to do. That’s a given. But, from everything I’ve read and from all the authors I’ve listened to, I know getting the first draft done is huge. No matter how terrible it is. Because at least now I have something to build up from. You can’t build up from nothing. And I have something!

I plan on The Lowell Saga being four books. The first draft of book 1 is now complete. At the moment I am currently letting it sleep for a bit and letting my mind focus on other tasks. But then I am going to dive straight in and try to read the whole draft through in a day and see what all the major things I need to fix are.

After that revision begins. Then when I feel comfortable enough there I will be moving onto book 2. Then the same process will ensue through the last two books, until the whole story is finished and then I will make sure the whole series is cohesive and that all the foreshadowing is correctly plotted and all the little nuances make sense all throughout. Then the story really will be done.

It’s a wonderfully scary thought. A very far away thought but one I know I’ll reach.

My writing friends I have a question for you. What do you do once you finish a first draft? Do you have any advice for me? This is new ground.

Till next time,

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word count: 79,327