Previous Post: Writing is Hard | WIP Update | September 2022 | Healthy
October is one of my favorite months. The weather is perfect for sweaters and boots, I usually feel productive and creative, and there is just something spooky in the air. In the best kind of way of course 🙂
October started out very rough. I didn’t get the job I was pinning for, I fell back into old unhealthy habits and my anxiety spiked again and then again and then again…. Usually all of this would have been enough to debilitate me and write the month off as terrible. But I won’t do that. Despite all the misfortune I fell into, this October was a good month after all. Not just because it’s one of my favorite months in general haha but because of how I handled my misfortune.
I was depressed about not getting the job I really wanted so I let myself feel the sadness for a bit but, I didn’t revel in it. I picked myself up. I set a new goal and made a plan to get there. Then, I told myself that job wasn’t meant for me and there is something better out there waiting. Now, I am waiting to hear back about another job I applied for so *fingers crossed*!!
I recognized the unhealthy habits that I started to fall into again, and I forced myself out. I paused when I found myself falling into the same old patterns I had been dying to change, and you know what… for months and months of trying to change I think I finally am. I finally am. It was easier than it ever was before to pull back and recognize my mistakes before they got too far. For months I struggled to do this whenever I hit a roadblock. But, this October, it was easier than it ever has been to not let my emotions get to me to the point of hating myself and not being able to do anything for days. I still struggle but I am doing better. Improving.
And as for my anxiety, that is a condition I know I will live with for the rest of my life. It is not curable but it is manageable and recently, I feel I am coming to terms with how to manage it and not let it overtake my life. It will not control me, I will control it.
So October though difficult at times was a good month.
Writing wise my editing of The Lowell Saga continues… since it falls into the fantasy genre I have been tweaking the world building and trying to add more and more nuances to make it feel more fleshed out. One of the greatest aspects of a fantasy story for readers is the world! What I have learned about my writing process is that my first drafts tend to be nothing more than skeletons. I start with the characters, and their bones. All my stories start with the people they’re about and that is how I get the itch to write. During the first draft, I get a whole lot out of the spirit of the characters, a semblance of plot and a blush of world building but the story itself doesn’t have blood or veins or skin or flesh. Editing is when I add all that stuff in making the second draft more full and able to breathe on its own. Not move yet but at least it can breathe. At least that is how the first book of The Lowell Saga is progressing.
And a result of that is my drafts are unusually very short for first drafts. But that’s okay. Writing is a process and everyone writes differently. I am, after such a rough ride this year, just happy to be writing again!
Hopefully in November I will be starting to implement all my changes in writing the second draft. I am not scared, but excited. Though I also know I have a long road ahead of me. But because of changing my mindset all through the past few months, writing isn’t a chore for me anymore. It’s fun! I am writing this story for me and maybe I will be lucky enough to share it one day.
Also Happy Halloween 😉
Till next month,
(Currently still revising the first draft of TLS…..)