“The Devil On My Shoulder”

I know
who I
am.

(thoughts
of you
always
in my head…)

I know
exactly
how to
destroy
myself.

(i see us
on repeat
as i dream
through the day…)

You
did not do
anything
wrong.

I
will take
total
fault.

(for the
feelings
are mine
alone…)

I
am
destroyed.

I
am
also
my destroyer.

(….)

I promise
I’ll disappear
and you will
never
see me again.

(i may be the devil
but i am the angel too.)

I
will save
you
from me.

(goodbye, my love)

Photo by Stefano Ciociola on Unsplash

©2020 Jai Lynn

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“Moon”

The first phantom
that appears in the night
leaves me wondering
in either longing, or fright.

Are you really
what I see?
There’s no such thing
as reality.

Sometimes smiling
with a Cheshire Cat grin.
Sometimes screaming,
mouth wide on a whim.

Are you
watching me?
Or am I the one
keeping you under lock and key?

Do you frighten
to keep me away?
Or are you scary
to keep the other monsters at bay?

As the night leaves
you will vanish soon.
Tell me, do you love
or hate me, my moon?

Photo by Luke Stackpoole on Unsplash

©2020 Jai Lynn

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“Ghosting Me”

The water is still
in the fountain
at my knee.
I toss a penny in
and there’s two faces
in the water to see.

Strolling on the walk,
my shadow long
as the sun sets low.
I reach out
at empty air
and don’t want to let go.

A table for two
but there is only
one plate set.
I try to tell the waitress
there’s two
for this bill’s debt.

Ice cream in the park
as the night
hits slow.
One cone to share
weaving the crowd
we walk toe to toe.

Laughter and words
can’t help
but slip from my lips.
You catch the vanilla
as you move your hand
from my hips.

Staring ensues
from strangers
who don’t see.
For some reason
they don’t know you
are standing next to me.

Midnight comes
as fast as summer
slips away.
But between us
there is still
so much to say.

“I’ll always be
there, I promise.”
your smile starts to sway.
And then
you disappear
as soon as night turns to day.

I’m really alone,
and there is no one
to stare.
I’m not crazy
my boyfriend’s just a ghost
I swear.

Photo by Artem Kovalev on Unsplash

©2020 Jai Lynn

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“In Dreams”

In dreams
we laugh
and kiss
and sing.

We are
together
as queen
and king.

In dreams
there is
no one else
but you and me.

Like our souls
know each other
though you and I
are yet to be.

Dreams though
cannot sustain
a life
forever.

I only see you
when I sleep,
and in reality
I see you never.

I
don’t
know
what
to
believe
anymore….

©2020 Jai Lynn

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“Wildfire”

“I’ll be right back.”
you said.

I hadn’t seen you
almost all day.

(like you were avoiding me…)

Yesterday
I had been
your world.

(did you know I had something to tell you,
something I needed you to know…)

I had to talk to you
even if just
for one
minute.

(did you mean to leave me behind?)

They say
if they want you
you will know.

(did I misread the signs?)

I was wrong,
I guess.

(I just saw what I wanted to see…)

But you
could have been
upfront.

Why
did
you
lie?

(“I’ll be right back.”)

Baby, I’m not
a back burner
kind of girl.

(“I’ll be right back.”)

I’m the fire
in the woods
that will
burn
the
world
down.

You’ll come back,
and I won’t be here.
But every
charred sight
you see,
every
ash
left behind
will remind
you
of
me.

Photo by Zoltan Tasi on Unsplash

©2020 Jai Lynn

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“Red Cardinal, Black Feather”

Red cardinal,
black feather,
storm clouds,
sunny weather.

Nerves of steel,
back straight.
They may laugh
but it’s too late.

Red cardinal,
black feather,
broken bones,
red strings sever.

Feelings high,
the rest low.
Queen’s don’t always
dress in gold.

Red cardinal,
black feather,
heart of ice
with a liquid center.

So many
broken bones…
and children laughing,
throwing stones.

Red cardinal,
black feather.
Lopsided crown
never looked better.

She’s too good
for this world.
Straightened rose glasses
from a vision once twirled.

Red cardinal,
black feather.
She decides
to be better.

Photo by freestocks on Unsplash

©2020 Jai Lynn

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“Where Is the Eye?”

I thought
I could handle
it
when I wished
for you.

I just
wanted a friend.
Someone
to be around.
Someone
to hold onto.

It didn’t matter
if you liked
me back.
I just thought
being near you
would be enough.

And it was…
for a bit.

Who knew
feelings
of a drizzle
could grow
into the rain
of a storm
that would spin
and spin
and pour
and pour
until I realized
all my thoughts
were drenched with
you.

I was naive.

My heart
can’t handle
this hurricane.

And you
have no idea
that I’m drowning.

Photo by Shashank Sahay on Unsplash

©2020 Jai Lynn

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